Expectation sic expectancy is one strand of a threefold cord—bound together with responsibility and dependency--that can function as a lifeline or a tripwire in our daily lives. There is so much tied up in this bundle, it is hard to decide where to start unraveling it. It is a knotty task, but one I am determined to untangle…hopefully, without any further ridiculous play on words. I apologize.
In all seriousness, I have been deliberating for the last few hours about the direction in which I want to wander thought-wise today. I keep vacillating between the subject of responsibility—a kissing cousin of expectation—and that of dependency—a privilege of our royal heritage as God's children that we can honor or squander.
If I am honest with myself, I have to admit that the words I speak and the actions I take are not always in sync. This does not necessarily mean I am insincere in my intention, but it does reflect a gap between the two. Such is the case in my basic struggle with where and in whom I put my trust. My heart is to trust God in all things; however, the gravitational pull in daily life often feels strongest in the “do-it-yourself” direction. The “Christian” twist on this is subtle, if not insidious, by giving God a bit-piece in the action: do-it-yourself –with God’s help; trust God, but break the problem into manageable pieces so solving it is doable—by us. Strengthen faith to be in a better position to handle the challenge next time around the mountain; persevere unto victory—practice makes perfect.
Unarguably, it honors God when we look to Him for help— for wisdom, strength, and faith to persevere. He desires to meet all our needs; He invites us to come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Heb. 4:16) The problem is not so much what we believe about God, but in our believing in Him, what we expect our experience of life to be. Are we seeking to overcome our struggles or seeking for God to overcome us, so whether or not the struggles abate, we prevail because God’s presence prevails? Are we looking to grow in faith so we can stare our troubles into oblivion, or so we become oblivious, through faith, to trouble’s power to trouble us?
Am I willing to depend on God by ceasing to seek solace in the hope for a lessening of adversity or for the increasing of my ability to handle it? Am I willing to lay down the shovel with which I have been building my own walls of protection and stock piling provisions for a rainy day, developing muscle to hedge my bets for success in withstanding future attacks? Am I willing to sell all I possess for the promise of God’s sufficiency becoming all I have: come what may—God to be my guide and stay?
Expectancy toward God requires a trusting dependence, without which, our expectancy is merely a façade for expectation; if God meets us by showing Himself strong on our behalf differently than we expect or desire, we find ourselves back at square one collecting yet another brick of disappointment. A quick-set mortar of resentment, confusion and discouragement stands at the ready to reinforce our doubts that having relationship with God makes much of a difference in situations or in our ability to cope with them as we face life’s trials.
True dependence on God is putting all our eggs into one basket; the basket is trust and the hands that hold it are God’s. Only God offers a hope that never disappoints—a living hope that lives within a relationship of unrelenting, unfailing love: a love that covers sin, overcomes the world, and conquers fear and death—once and for all. In Christ, the victory is won. Might we have to live with a few thorns in the flesh? Might we temporarily feel the emotional brunt of defeat? Might we have to be content, moment by moment, with the sufficiency He and His grace provide? Might we have to rejoice always and be anxious for nothing because God is faithful? If answering “Yes” to the above questions is as hard as it gets, I think I can live with that.
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